Dear Eleciah

I told my friend and colleague Alicia that I would write this blog for her, so that’s what this is.

Hi Alisha! Welcome to reading my blog. Despite the fact that we’re friends, I suspect that you’ve never read anything that I’ve written. Or maybe because we’re friends and you don’t want to have to rethink that.

Either way, she and I were talking about this weird job that we do, which is something pastors do when they get together.

She made a good point that I’m sitting with and will probably try to remember most days that I’m doing this job. There is no point in trying to invent a program that no one has asked for that I don’t want to do. This seems obvious, but this is a weird job. Sometimes, I feel like I’m supposed to do something (anything?) to justify that I’m still a “good pastor.” Summer is an especially pernicious time for this. People go on vacation, programming slows down, things are generally more relaxed (note, this isn’t universally true. If this isn’t the case for you, my apologies for overgeneralizing). With that, it can be tempting to want to invent something to make me look busy and pastor-y without actually knowing why I’m doing it.

I’m not talking about not doing anything, that would be boring. I’m talking about the things that exist just to look nice on the calendar. I’m talking about the felt obligation to have a Bible study where I’m the only person who shows up. I’m talking about hosting a potluck where the only food is the brownies that I brought (this is not a real situation, I would love to just sit in a room and eat a whole tray of brownies).

Here’s what I’m not talking about. I’m not talking about getting together with a few members of the church and playing bridge on Thursday mornings. I’m not talking about going to the Museum of Play next Monday. I’m not talking about the Blessing of the Animals this coming Sunday. I’m not talking about the women’s association meetings. I’m not talking about the community garden.

“But Jeff,” I can hear Eelecia saying, “aren’t those just things that you’re doing for no reason? What makes them different?”

That’s a great question! What makes some of them different is that I’m excited about them. If I am doing things that excite me, then even if it turns out to be a failure at least I had fun trying. If I’m doing things that excite me, then people might want to come just because we can share in each other’s enthusiasm. If I’m doing things that excite me, I do a better job of planning and executing. Some of those things are different because someone wants to do them. I love learning about people’s passions, and I love supporting that sort of excitement. Even if I don’t want to do it, I’m much happier to do it because I know that it is something that matters. I would much rather do something I don’t like that was someone else’s idea than something that I am indifferent to that was my idea.

I guess this ties to what I was talking about last week. (Sorry Eliecia, you have to read another one of these if you want to know what I’m saying). When I write this blog I do it because I want to. I do it because it adds something to my life and part of my job is to share myself with you all. I do it because sometimes people tell me they appreciate something I write. Pastors who fall into the, “Program for programs sake” trap are doing ministry by way of producing content. Units of content to be consumed, but don’t have any other justification. There was a time that I was exceedingly concerned about looking like a “good pastor.” That sounds boring. I don’t want to be a “good pastor,” I want to be your pastor. I can only be your pastor if I can bring myself to the work. When I schedule a perfunctory item of content, then I’m not bringing myself to the work.

I’m keeping myself plenty busy, thank you very much. But I’m not going to keep myself busy so I can tell people how busy I am. That being said, I hope you’ll all come to the Bible study no one asked for at a time no one is available!

I spelled Alecia’s name right once in this post, bonus points to anyone who can find it.

Peace,

Jeff